【騙されるな】女の本音と建前25選

TLDR;

This video reveals 25 hidden truths behind what women say, contrasting their real intentions with their spoken words. It emphasizes that women often communicate indirectly to maintain harmony and avoid conflict. The video aims to help men understand these nuances to improve their dating success, avoid common pitfalls, and build more meaningful connections.

• Women often say one thing but mean another to avoid conflict.
• Understanding these hidden meanings can significantly improve dating success.
• Men need to look beyond the surface and understand the underlying message.

Introduction [0:00]

The video introduces the concept that women often don't say what they truly mean, instead relying on "tatemae" (建前), or social facades, to avoid conflict and maintain harmony. This is a natural behavior rooted in instinct. Men often misunderstand these cues because they tend to communicate directly. The video promises to reveal 25 of these hidden meanings to help men better understand women and improve their dating lives.

1. "I'm Looking for a Serious Relationship" [2:06]

When a woman writes "I'm looking for a serious relationship" on a dating app profile, it's often not entirely true. Many women who write this are simply trying to filter out undesirable men or those who are only looking for casual encounters. Truly serious women don't feel the need to state this explicitly. Some women who have a history of casual encounters may say this, but it's difficult for them to change their behavior due to human homeostasis, which resists change.

2. "I'm Busy This Month, Let's Reschedule" [4:44]

This is a polite rejection. If a woman is genuinely interested, she will make time, even if she is busy. She might suggest alternative dates or times. If she only says she's busy and doesn't offer an alternative, it means she's not interested. If a woman is interested, she will rearrange her schedule to meet you.

3. "Isn't [Another Girl's Name] Cute?"

This is a test. She is gauging your interest in her by comparing herself to another girl. If you like her, don't compliment the other girl. Instead, say something neutral or compliment her directly. Women are often insecure and want reassurance.

4. "I'm Not Interested in a Boyfriend Right Now" [8:20]

This is a polite way of saying she's not interested in a romantic relationship with you. She is stating her current situation to avoid directly rejecting you. If you persist, you will be seen as insensitive and unattractive. It's best to accept this and move on.

5. "Anything is Fine" [9:27]

This phrase has two meanings. If she says it proactively, it means she genuinely wants to accommodate you. However, if she says it in response to you saying "anything is fine," it's a trap. Women dislike making decisions for others and being held responsible if things go wrong. Always offer choices and avoid putting her in a position where she has to decide everything.

6. "I'll Contact You Again" [11:21]

Don't take this literally. She might say this to be polite, even if she has no intention of contacting you. If she's interested, she might be hesitant to initiate contact. It's up to you to follow up. However, don't be passive. Take the initiative and message her first. If you're too afraid to make the first move, you'll miss opportunities. If you want her to contact you, create a reason for her to do so, such as asking her to confirm she got home safe.

7. "You're Cute" [12:55]

Being called "cute" is a high compliment. It means she finds you endearing and is experiencing "母性本能 (bosei honnou)," or maternal instincts, towards you. Unlike being called "cool," being "cute" means she'll find you adorable even when you make mistakes. This indicates strong interest.

8. "You Seem Popular" [15:37]

This is a very good sign. It means she perceives that other women also find you attractive, which increases your value in her eyes. Women are often influenced by what other women think. She might also be subtly asking if you have a girlfriend.

9. "You're Naughty" [16:50]

Being called "naughty" (チャラい - charai) is a compliment. It implies that you have experience with women and are desirable. While women might say they prefer serious men, they are often drawn to those with experience. If a woman calls you "charai," it's an opportunity to escalate the interaction.

10. "You're Serious" [18:39]

This is the opposite of "charai" and is not a good sign. It means she finds you boring and uninteresting. If a woman says this, move on.

11. "I Don't Like Chubby Guys" [19:19]

While slim and fit men are generally popular, some women prefer men with a bit of a build. However, this doesn't mean you should let yourself go. Maintain good hygiene and groom yourself. Women want to feel protected and secure, which a slightly larger man can provide.

12. "I've Never Experienced This Before" [20:52]

This is often said by "azatoi" (あざとい) women, or women who are calculatedly charming, to make you feel like you're special and the best she's been with. Men love to be number one, and this is a way to appeal to that desire. It's a sign that she is very interested in you.

13. "I Want to Go to [Place]"

She is indirectly inviting you to take her there. Women often can't directly invite someone, so they express their interest in a place, hoping you'll suggest going together. Take the hint and invite her.

14. "Is the Last Train Okay?" [23:17]

She wants to go home. She's not enjoying her time with you and wants to end the date. Don't ignore this hint. End the date and let her go. If she were having a good time, she wouldn't mention the last train.

15. "I Don't Have to Wake Up Early Tomorrow" [24:39]

She is open to staying out all night. She is indirectly signaling that she is interested in going back to your place or a hotel. Take the hint and suggest it. However, even if she says this, she might still refuse once as a social formality. Persist once, but if she strongly refuses, back off.

16. "I'm Getting Sleepy/Drunk" [26:53]

She wants you to take her back to your place or a hotel. She is signaling that she is vulnerable and needs to be taken care of. Don't make her say it directly. Take the initiative and suggest going somewhere more private.

17. "I Love Handsome Men" [27:52]

While women appreciate good looks, cleanliness and health are more important. Women are instinctively assessing your health and genetic fitness. Being "kakue," or having a higher status, is also more important than looks. Men get tired of beautiful women after a few days, but women get tired of handsome men even faster. Women prioritize finding a partner with good genes and the ability to provide for offspring.

18. "Let's Get to Know Each Other Better First" [30:51]

This is a gentle rejection. She is implying that she's not interested in anything beyond friendship. She wants you to wait and build a connection, but this is a way to keep you at a distance. Women go on dates to get to know someone, so this statement is contradictory. She is not interested in getting to know you better.

19. "I'm Okay" [33:54]

This can mean she is genuinely okay, or it can mean she is hiding her true feelings. If she insists she's okay after you press her, she's probably fine. However, if she says it with hesitation, she might be hiding something. In that case, don't push her, but let her know you're there for her if she needs to talk.

20. "Confess on the Third Date" [35:25]

This is a myth. Waiting until the third date is too slow. Women want things to move quickly. Aim to confess on the second date. Men who are too slow risk losing the woman's interest.

21. "I Won't Stay Overnight" [38:02]

She is open to a hookup but doesn't want to stay the night. She might not have makeup or a change of clothes. A two-hour "break" is fine for the first encounter. If you want her to stay over, have basic toiletries available at your place.

22. "You Don't Have a 'Kenja Time'?" [39:54]

"Kenja time" (賢者タイム) refers to the post-coital refractory period. If she says you don't have one, it's a huge compliment. It means you're still attentive and affectionate after sex. Neglecting a woman during "kenja time" can lead to accusations of non-consensual sex.

23. "Oh, That's Amazing" [41:08]

She is not interested in what you're saying. She is giving a polite, generic response to end the conversation. If she were interested, she would ask follow-up questions. Stop talking about yourself and change the subject.

24. "I'll Pay Half" [42:10]

She is testing you. She wants you to refuse and pay for the entire meal. If she insists on paying, accept her offer. Be a man with financial freedom.

25. "You're Unique" [43:09]

She thinks you're weird. She is trying to be polite but doesn't know what else to say. This is not a compliment.

Conclusion [43:37]

The video concludes by emphasizing the importance of reviewing and internalizing these 25 truths. The presenter encourages viewers to leave comments and feedback. She also promotes her official LINE account, which offers additional resources and exclusive content on dating and relationships.