3 Hours of Manipulation Tricks Used by Narcissists to Fall Asleep To

Brief Summary

This video provides a comprehensive overview of manipulative tactics used by narcissists to control and undermine others. It explains each tactic with examples and offers strategies for recognizing and countering them. The video emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, trusting your instincts, and prioritizing your well-being to break free from these manipulative cycles.

Triangulation involves creating tension and insecurity by introducing a third party into relationships.
Love bombing is an intense tactic of overwhelming someone with affection to gain control.
Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation to make someone question their own reality.
Financial control is a form of abuse where money is used to dominate and restrict someone's freedom.

Triangulation

Triangulation is a manipulative tactic where a narcissist involves a third party to create tension, jealousy, and insecurity. Instead of addressing issues directly, they bring in someone else—an ex, friend, or even a stranger—to shift power dynamics and keep you off balance. This makes you feel like you're competing for their approval, leading to emotional instability. To break free, refuse to play the game and confront them directly, not allowing them to dictate your self-worth.

Love Bombing

Love bombing is an intense manipulation tactic where a narcissist overwhelms you with excessive affection, attention, and praise to gain control. Initially, it feels like the most powerful love you've ever experienced, with constant compliments, grand gestures, and promises of an extraordinary future. However, beneath this adoration lies a calculated agenda to make you emotionally dependent before slowly withdrawing. Real love is consistent and steady, not rushed or overwhelming.

Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation tactic designed to make you question your own reality, memories, and sanity. A narcissist employs this strategy by persistently denying things they've said or done, twisting facts, and making you feel like your emotions and perceptions are unreliable. Over time, this erodes your confidence in your own mind, making you more dependent on them. To break free, recognize it for what it is, document conversations, trust your instincts, and seek external perspectives.

Silent Treatment

The silent treatment is a form of emotional manipulation where a narcissist deliberately ignores you, withholds communication, or refuses to acknowledge your presence as a way to punish and control you. Unlike a healthy time out, it is intentional, cruel, and designed to make you feel powerless. To break free, stop chasing their approval and walk away, as healthy relationships involve open dialogue and mutual respect, not emotional starvation.

Projection

Projection is a psychological manipulation tactic where a narcissist accuses you of the very behaviors they themselves are guilty of. Instead of taking responsibility for their flaws, mistakes, or toxic actions, they shift the blame onto you. To counter projection, stop engaging and recognize that their words are revealing their own behaviors.

Blame Shifting

Blame shifting is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist deflects responsibility for their actions by placing the blame entirely on you. No matter what happens, it is always your fault. To break free, recognize the pattern and refuse to accept responsibility for things that are not your fault.

Guilt Tripping

Guilt tripping is a powerful manipulation tactic where a narcissist uses guilt to control your emotions, decisions, and behavior. They twist situations to make you feel like you owe them something, even when you've done nothing wrong. To counter guilt tripping, recognize it for what it is and remind yourself that guilt is not a debt.

Victim Playing

Victim playing is a manipulative strategy where a narcissist pretends to be the helpless, wounded party to gain sympathy, avoid blame, or excuse their toxic behavior. To counter victim playing, stay focused on the facts and acknowledge their emotions if they seem genuine, but don't let their pity-seeking derail the conversation.

Hoovering

Hoovering is a manipulative tactic narcissists use to suck you back into their control after you've pulled away, set boundaries, or tried to leave the relationship. To break free from hoovering, recognize it for what it is—manipulation wrapped in false remorse—and maintain firm boundaries or no contact.

Stonewalling

Stonewalling is a form of psychological manipulation where a narcissist deliberately refuses to engage in conversation, acknowledge your presence, or provide any form of communication to control and frustrate you. To counter stonewalling, recognize it as a manipulation tactic and refuse to chase after their attention.

Minimization

Minimization is a manipulation tactic used by narcissists to downplay your concerns, emotions, or experiences, making you feel like you're overreacting or being irrational. To counter minimization, stand firm in your emotions and recognize that their reaction is not a reflection of reality but a manipulation strategy.

Word Salad

Word salad is a chaotic communication tactic used by narcissists to confuse, exhaust, and manipulate you. Instead of engaging in clear, logical conversation, they speak in a convoluted, circular, or nonsensical manner. To deal with word salad, refuse to engage and set firm boundaries, walking away from the discussion if they refuse to communicate clearly.

Future Faking

Future faking is a deceptive manipulation tactic where a narcissist makes grand promises about the future that they have no real intention of keeping. To break free from future faking, focus on actions, not words, and start building your own future on your own terms.

Mirroring

Mirroring is a psychological manipulation technique where a narcissist copies your personality, interests, values, and even speech patterns to create a false sense of connection and trust. To protect yourself from mirroring, take your time before deeply investing in a relationship and pay attention to whether someone's interests and values remain consistent over time.

Baiting

Baiting is a psychological manipulation tactic where a narcissist deliberately provokes you to react emotionally so they can play the victim, shift blame, or justify their own toxic behavior. To deal with baiting, refuse to take the bait and remain calm and detached, responding with indifference to remove their power.

Financial Control

Financial control is a form of manipulation where a narcissist uses money to dominate, restrict, and keep you dependent on them. To protect yourself from financial control, maintain independence over your own money and seek help from trusted professionals if you are already in a situation where financial control is being used against you.

Flying Monkeys

Flying monkeys are people a narcissist uses to spy, manipulate, or attack on their behalf. To deal with flying monkeys, set firm boundaries and do not engage in debates, defend yourself excessively, or try to explain your side to them.

Intermittent Reinforcement

Intermittent reinforcement is a psychological manipulation technique where a narcissist gives sporadic affection, approval, or rewards to keep you emotionally hooked. To break free from intermittent reinforcement, recognize the pattern and step back emotionally, focusing on the overall trend of the relationship rather than occasional moments of kindness.

Emotional Withholding

Emotional withholding is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist deliberately refuses to show love, affection, or validation to control you. To counter emotional withholding, recognize that love and validation should not be something you have to beg for and shift your focus towards self-validation and relationships where love is freely given.

Pathological Lying

Pathological lying is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist lies constantly, even when unnecessary, to maintain control over situations and people. To deal with a pathological liar, stop trying to get the truth out of them and distance yourself, as trust should be earned through actions, not just words.

Deliberate Forgetfulness

Deliberate forgetfulness is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist pretends to forget things that are important to you as a way to exert control, invalidate your feelings, and frustrate you into submission. To deal with deliberate forgetfulness, document important conversations and agreements and recognize the difference between occasional forgetfulness and a pattern of manipulation.

Boundary Testing

Boundary testing is a manipulation strategy where a narcissist constantly pushes or violates your boundaries in small ways to see how much they can get away with. To stop boundary testing, enforce your boundaries and distance yourself from those who do not respect your limits.

Fear Mongering

Fear mongering is a psychological manipulation tactic where a narcissist instills fear in you to control your thoughts, actions, and decisions. To counter fear mongering, recognize when fear is being used as a tool of control rather than a genuine concern for your well-being and make decisions based on facts, not intimidation.

Discrediting

Discrediting is a toxic manipulation tactic where a narcissist deliberately undermines your credibility in front of others. To combat discrediting, stay calm, let your actions speak louder than their words, and surround yourself with people who genuinely know and respect you.

Shaming

Shaming is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist deliberately makes you feel inadequate, unworthy, or deeply flawed to undermine your confidence and gain control over you. To counter shaming, recognize it for what it is—a tool of control, not a reflection of your worth—and refuse to internalize their negativity.

One-Upping

Competitive one-upping is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist constantly diminishes your achievements, making you feel like nothing you do is ever enough. To deal with competitive one-upping, stop seeking validation from the narcissist and understand that their behavior is rooted in their own insecurity.

Narrative Control

Controlling the narrative is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist rewrites past events to fit their version of the story. To counter this manipulation, document everything, trust your memory, seek outside perspectives, and refuse to let them dictate your reality.

Sabotaging Success

Sabotaging success is a control tactic where a narcissist deliberately undermines your progress to keep you dependent on them. To counter this manipulation, recognize their attempts to hold you back and push forward anyway, surrounding yourself with people who support your growth.

Excessive Flattery

Excessive flattery is a manipulative tactic where a narcissist showers you with over-the-top praise, admiration, and compliments to gain your trust before subtly exerting control over you. To guard against excessive flattery, look at actions, not just words, and be cautious if someone's praise feels too intense, too soon, or too exaggerated.

Emotional Blackmail

Emotional blackmail is a powerful and cruel manipulation tactic where a narcissist uses fear, guilt, or threats to force you into doing what they want. To deal with emotional blackmail, recognize it and refuse to engage, shifting the responsibility back to them and setting boundaries.

Denying Reality

Denying reality is a deeply manipulative tactic where a narcissist insists that things never happened the way you remember, even when undeniable proof exists. To counter this manipulation, trust your own perceptions and stop seeking validation from someone who benefits from keeping you confused.

Grooming

Grooming is a slow and calculated process where a narcissist conditions you to accept mistreatment without realizing it. To protect yourself, recognize patterns early and trust your instincts if someone slowly increases their control, makes you doubt yourself, or conditions you to tolerate behavior you once found unacceptable.

Feigning Helplessness

Feigning helplessness is a covert yet highly effective manipulation tactic where a narcissist pretends to be incapable of handling responsibilities, solving problems, or making decisions only to shift the burden onto you. To counter this manipulation, stop stepping in and offer guidance but let them figure it out, letting them face the consequences of their own inaction.

Double Standards

Double standards are a classic narcissistic manipulation tactic where they hold you to strict rules and expectations while refusing to follow them themselves. To break free from double standards, stop playing by their rules and set your own standards, refusing to engage in their manipulative games.

Exaggeration

Exaggeration is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist overdramatizes events, emotions, or circumstances to distort your perception of reality. To handle exaggeration, stick to the facts and calmly restate the reality of what actually happened without getting sucked into their emotional manipulation.

Backhanded Compliments

Backhanded compliments are a passive-aggressive manipulation tactic where a narcissist disguises an insult as praise. To deal with backhanded compliments, recognize them for what they are—disguised insults meant to manipulate you—and call it out directly.

Information Overload

Overloading you with information, also known as information dumping, is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist bombards you with excessive, unnecessary, or confusing details to overwhelm, distract, and control you. To counter this tactic, refuse to get lost in their word maze and interrupt and redirect the conversation back to the key issue.

Playing Dumb

Playing dumb is a calculated manipulation tactic where a narcissist pretends to be clueless, forgetful, or incapable of understanding a situation to avoid accountability, responsibility, or effort. To counter this tactic, stop giving them the benefit of the doubt and hold them accountable for their actions.

Pity Plays

Pity plays are a powerful manipulation tactic where a narcissist uses soab stories, exaggerated hardships, or emotional suffering to gain sympathy and control over you. To deal with pity plays, recognize the difference between genuine pain and manipulation and offer support to those who truly want to grow, but don't let guilt force you into tolerating mistreatment.

Love Withdrawal

Love withdrawal is a cruel and calculated manipulation tactic where a narcissist suddenly takes away affection, attention, and warmth as a way to punish you and regain control. To break free from love withdrawal, recognize that their affection was never real love but a tool for control and refuse to chase what should be given freely.

Creating Confusion

Creating confusion is a powerful manipulation tactic where a narcissist deliberately sends mixed messages, contradicts themselves, and constantly shifts the goal posts to keep you mentally off balance. To protect yourself from this tactic, trust your perception and stop looking for consistency where there is none.

Mocking

Mocking is a subtle yet deeply damaging manipulation tactic where a narcissist uses sarcasm, ridicule, and belittling humor to undermine your self-esteem and dismiss your feelings. To counter mocking, refuse to engage in their game and call it out directly.

Fake Apologies

Fake apologies are a deceptive manipulation tactic where a narcissist pretends to take responsibility for their actions but has no genuine remorse. To deal with fake apologies, stop accepting words without actions and recognize that an empty apology is just another tool for control.

Demanding Perfection

Demanding Perfection is a cruel manipulation tactic where a narcissist sets impossible standards for you, ensuring that no matter how hard you try, you will never be good enough. To break free from this trap, reject their impossible standards and set your own, embracing your worth, Flaws and All.

Shifting Goalposts

Shifting goalposts is a manipulation tactic where a narcissist constantly changes their expectations and demands, ensuring that no matter what you do, it is never enough. To counter this manipulation, stop playing their game and recognize that their expectations are designed to be unreachable.

Unpredictability

Unpredictability is a psychological manipulation tactic where a narcissist constantly shifts their mood, behavior, and reactions to keep you emotionally off balance. To break free from this manipulation, stop trying to predict their moods and recognize the pattern.

Forced Isolation

Forced isolation is a deeply Insidious manipulation tactic where a narcissist gradually Cuts you off from your support systems to make you entirely dependent on them. To counter forced isolation, recognize the pattern early and ask yourself who benefits from your isolation.

Turning Others Against You

Turning others against you, also known as smear campaigning, is a vicious form of manipulation where a narcissist spreads lies, distorts reality, and subtly poisons people's perception of you to isolate you and maintain control. To protect yourself from a smear campaign, stay grounded in your truth and focus on maintaining strong connections with those who truly know and support you.

Gossiping

Gossiping about you is a calculated manipulation tactic where a narcissist spreads lies, half-truths, or distorted stories to damage your credibility, reputation, and relationships. To counter this manipulation, stop chasing other people's approval and let your consistency, integrity, and character speak for itself.

Disregarding Needs

Disregarding your needs is a core trait of narcissistic manipulation where they ignore, dismiss, or minimize what you need emotionally, physically, or mentally while expecting you to give them your full attention and Care. To break free from this Dynamic, start honoring your own needs, even when they try to make you feel guilty for doing so.

False Ultimatums

False ultimatums are a manipulative tactic where a narcissist threatens to leave, hurt themselves, or take drastic action if you don't comply with their demands. To handle this manipulation, refuse to engage in the emotional blackmail and let them face the consequences of their own actions.

Setting You Up to Fail

Setting you up to fail is a particularly cruel manipulation tactic where a narcissist gives you impossible tasks, unrealistic expectations, or conflicting instructions only to turn around and blame you when you can't succeed. To counter this tactic, recognize when the expectations being placed on you are unreasonable and refuse to engage in their impossible game.